Our guests go out to Matopos for the day. they have booked to stay an extra night.
I go to part one of a meditation class I have joined. I know things like this are often very popular at the beginning of the year, but this time I feel a really strong need for life to be different. I just don't want to carry on living the same year over and over again and I am intrigued by the idea that you can change your life by changing your thoughts.
Unfortunately, I do think that I am wired, not to necessarily be negative, but to expect disappointment. My mum, God bless her, was very much like this. She would always encourage us in everything we did, but was not surprised when things did not go well. She even admitted to me once that she feared being really excited about something and then it not happening. Better to expect the worst and not be disappointed.
The class is great. I really enjoy the meditations we do, but on the way home I find myself bursting into tears for no real reason.
Our guests come back from the Matopos. They are disappointed that they did not see the rhino but were not prepared to pay US$80 for a guide. I really do think that the tourist authorities do themselves a disservice when they overcharge like this. There is a lot of thunder and lightning, but hardly any rain. We switch the wi-fi off though as we have lost two modems to lightning. The guests are fine with it off.
In the evening we go to a friend's birthday braai. I am not drinking alcohol, not because I have a drinking problem, but just because it's nice to have a break sometimes. Tonight is my first real challenge since I started this, but, although a gin and tonic would be nice, I am content with the tonic on its own.
Our friend wants to start a positive thinking group to help people through life in Zim. I think it's a great idea. Many people here live with a lot of sadness and a lot of fear. Can you live in Zimbabwe and be happy? That is the philosophical question of the day.
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