I try and extend our McAfee subscription to cover another laptop, but have a problem as I receive a message that our subscription expired 1008 days ago which conflicts with the fact that it is installed and working well on my laptop. I contact the McAfee helpdesk where I am given a whole lot of options to choose from, but none of them fit the question I need to ask. I try their chatline where I am reliably informed that I am not talking to a human being. I type my question and, again, because it does not fit a formula, I cannot be helped. Eventually, I am put through to a real person.
Armina: Hey there! How are ya?
Me: Fine, thank you. (I hesitate. Should I ask Armina how he/she is or get to the crux of the matter right away?) How are you?
Armina: I'm good. How can I help?
I explain the matter.
Armina: OK, I'm just going to look up your subscription. In the meantime, how has the rest of your day been?
I pause. I think. Armina, you really do not want to know about the rest of my day. You have a script in front of you. You are following what you were told to do in your training seminar. There is a chance this chat is being recorded so you want it down in black and white that you were quite courteous and nice to your customer. You do not want to know that when I woke up there was no electricity and when I go home there will be no electricity. You do not want to know that I have about half a litre of petrol left in my tank and I don't know where to get any more from.
Me: Great, thanks.
The water cuts have been extended by an extra day.
Everyone is feeling very depressed and the weather doesn't help. Ellie plays Christmas songs she has downloaded on my laptop.
In the evening, it rains again for about ten minutes, accompanied by a great display of thunder and lightning.
The frogs are back.
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